We knew she reluctantly postponed plans for a Las Vegas residency last year
We knew she eventually canceled them in May.
We knew she was heeding doctors' advice to stay close to home in Nashville.
We knew she was being treated at Vanderbilt University Medical Center.
We knew she was "still healin', still workin'."
We never wanted to know that death would come for her so soon.
This one stings the soul.
Reading the bottomless cache of tributes flooding the internet is cathartic.
What's the opposite of doom-scrolling? Love-scrolling.
My emotional thirst feels quenchless. The remembrances are the metaphorical band-aids that we fruitlessly try to stick onto our hearts, yet they slip off because our hearts weep.
I will bend toward the joy, laughter, and humor (especially the self-deprecating kind) that Dolly projected into the world. This was the intangible currency she lavishly spent on us.
Up until ten years ago, I was neutral (at best) about Dolly Parton. I locked her talent and music into the country music vault and rarely opened it.
Aside from the obvious glory of her duet with Kenny Rogers covering the Bee Gees tune, Islands in the Stream, her movie debut as Doralee in 9 to 5 with that bouncy, feminist earworm of a title song, the 'leave my man be' warning of Jolene, and her pop crossover tune Here You Come Again, there was little room in my music-loving mind for country.
That all changed when my friend, Susan, who, knowing my fervor for music and concerts, casually asked if I would like to see Dolly perform at the Mann Music Center in 2016.
I scrunched up my nose, replying, "I'm not really into country music." Poor Susan. Her apparent slam-dunk invitation received a surprisingly glum response.
She persisted, asserting with urgent disbelief, "But it's DOLLY!"
As a child growing up in Missouri, where the sound of Dolly and Elvis music reliably filled her home, Susan now faced a curious, misinformed roadblock to her fun outing idea. Undaunted, she eventually won me over.
I am ever grateful for Susan's wise tenacity. She is a college professor who immediately spotted a teachable moment. I also think she felt a little sorry for me and my wayward music limits.
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| Dolly Parton, Mann Music Center, 2016 |
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| Susan and I, 2016, Mann Music Center |
The concert was held three days after the horrific shootings at the Pulse nightclub in Orlando, where 49 innocents died, with many others injured. It was, at the time, the worst mass shooting in the US. (That dubious marker has long been surpassed in this gun-obsessed country.)
Enter the salve of Dolly.
The Pure and Simple tour was titled after her 2016 album. Dolly delivered just that - a pure and simple night of songs (28!) from her then five-decade career. She filled that perfect June evening with her infectious warmth, candor, and laughter when our psyches needed it most.
Her spirit not only sparkled, but her instruments (nine to be exact) and costumes exploded with glitter. Her stage patter about growing up poor in Tennessee, how love ruled her life, how leading with kindness was the only way to lead, and how her inclusive faith-driven beliefs welcomed everyone into the Dolly-sphere, entranced us.
Inclusion.
Every. Single. Person.
Her audience defied singular description because it was a diverse cross-section of race, sex, ethnicity, sexual orientation, and age. There we all were - drinking in Dolly in collective gulps.
I remember feeling Dolly's warm embrace all evening. She repeatedly assured us of her love while cracking jokes and sharing stories with the ease of a pro. Her humanity informed her performance style.
It is embarrassing to think I tried to blow off this chance to see Dolly.
It is equally embarrassing that I didn't recognize her prolific songwriting history, especially with I Will Always Love You. She assured the audience that when asked how she felt about Whitney Houston's success with the remarkable 1992 cover, Dolly would say, "I thank Whitney every time I look at my bank statement!"
The songwriting royalties, estimated at $10 million in the 1990s, were partially used to invest in an office complex and strip mall in a historically black Nashville neighborhood. Dolly called it "the house that Whitney built."
Dolly-related items, such as a cup of ambition wine glass, and a Dolly Parton cookbook, have been lovingly gifted to me by Susan because "it's Dolly!" Susan traveled to Nashville in 2025 to see Dolly Parton: A True Original Musical; in January, I'll join her and another devotee to see it on Broadway.
Dolly surprised the Newport Folk Festival audience in 2019, appearing (incredibly for the first time) alongside The Highwomen (Brandi Carlile, Maren Morris, Natalie Hemby, and Amanda Shires.) I didn't attend that year but read/heard that the female mega-group closed out the festival with silken harmonies and musicianship excellence,
Things were always better with the Dolly dazzle.
A few years ago, my husband and I visited the Tennessee side of the Great Smoky Mountains National Park as one stop on a wider Fall road trip through the South. Seeing a chance to possibly visit the iconic Dollywood, we arrived in Pigeon Forge late Monday evening only to find that Tuesdays were the sole days the park was closed in October. Sigh.
As a strange and somewhat anemic consolation prize, that Tuesday we drove around the empty parking lot to lay eyes on something Dollywood. Leaving the area, an exit sign sparkled in Dolly's handwriting, reminding visitors one final time I will always love you!
Another hug.
In a recent episode of Glennon Doyle's podcast, We Can Do Hard Things, Glennon hosted singer/songwriter Sara Bareilles. Promoting her Good Grief album, due next month, Sara said it grew from her experiences mourning loved ones she had lost in recent years.
Their conversation challenged writer Jamie Anderson's widely quoted claim that grief is love with nowhere to go.
Glennon offered that instead of burying the dead with our grief, we give grief someplace to go.
Sara replied, "What if we just carried the dead?"
Let's be the spiritual pallbearers who carry Dolly forward every day. Let's start with books, just like Dolly. https://imaginationlibrary.com/the-dollywood-foundation/
Let's lead with kindness - just like Dolly.
...and we rely on each other - ah ah. 🦋
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| 9 to 5 cup of ambition from Susan |
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| Dollywood, October 2023 |
Light painting artist Darius Pearson (love his work) created this Instagram post to honor Dolly.
Link to Philadelphia Magazine's brief 2016 review of Dolly's June 15 concert at the Mann Music Center in Philly. https://www.phillymag.com/things-to-do/2016/06/16/dolly-parton-review/
Link to a 2016 WHYY review of Dolly's June 15 concert at the Mann Music Center in Philly
Link to a 2026 Boston.com article re: Dolly. https://www.boston.com/culture/celebs/2026/08/26/a-saint-and-a-unicorn-new-englanders-remember-dolly-parton/
